Here is a 5-Day Devotional Guide based on your sermon series "Uncommon Courtesy."
DAY 1: STRENGTH UNDER CONTROL
Read: Titus 3:1-2; Matthew 11:28-30
Reflect:
When we hear the word "courtesy" or "gentleness," we often think of weakness. We picture a doormat that lets people walk all over it. But the Greek word Paul uses in Titus (prautēs) describes something entirely different. It was used to describe a warhorse that had been trained—an animal with massive muscle and fire, yet completely responsive to the rider’s touch.
True courtesy isn't the absence of power; it is power under control. Like Desmond Doss on Hacksaw Ridge, who refused to touch a gun yet carried 75 men to safety, biblical courtesy requires a spine of steel. It takes far more strength to absorb an insult than it does to return one.
Quote:
"Nothing is more powerful than a gentle soul... for such a one is strong as a rock. Though he be insulted, though he be struck, he remains unmoved." — St. John Chrysostom
Question:
Where in your life have you confused "gentleness" with "weakness"?
Action Step:
Identify one situation today (traffic, a meeting, a conversation) where you feel the urge to "flex" your power or opinion. Instead, choose the "stronger" path of holding your tongue and offering a gentle response.
Prayer:
Jesus, You are the Lion and the Lamb. You showed me that real power looks like washing feet and bearing crosses. Give me the strength of a warhorse and the gentleness of a dove today. Amen.
DAY 2: THE IDOL OF BEING RIGHT
Read: Titus 3:3; James 4:1-2
Reflect:
Why do we quarrel? Why is the comment section on social media a dumpster fire of rage? Paul gives us the diagnosis in Titus 3:3—we are "hated and hating one another."
The root cause isn't usually the topic we are arguing about; it’s the idol in our hearts. We often argue because we are terrified orphans. We feel that if we don't prove we are "right," we lose our value. We use our arguments to validate our existence. But when validation is your goal, courtesy becomes impossible. You cannot be gentle with someone you are trying to defeat.
Quote:
"Anger is the drug that seems to give access to power... We feel as though we have power and control—but that is a mirage. In the end, you will be miserable, overpowered by your own anger." — Ed Welch
Question:
When was the last time you felt a frantic need to have the "last word"? What were you trying to prove about yourself?
Action Step:
Fast from the "Last Word." Today, if you get into a disagreement (even a small one), let the other person have the final say. Notice how it feels—does it threaten your identity, or can you rest in Christ?
Prayer:
Father, I confess that I often fight for approval rather than resting in Yours. Pull down the idol of "Being Right" in my heart. Remind me that I don't need to win arguments to be loved by You. Amen.
DAY 3: THE APPEARING OF KINDNESS
Read: Titus 3:4-5; Romans 5:8
Reflect:
The pivot point of the Christian life is found in Titus 3:4: "But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared..."
Notice when God appeared. He didn't wait until we were courteous. He didn't wait until we had cleaned up our act or agreed with Him. He appeared while we were "foolish and disobedient" (v. 3). He saved us not because of our good manners, but "according to his own mercy." This is the fuel for our courtesy. We don't love others because they are lovable; we love them because we have been loved when we were unlovable.
Quote:
"Grace means that God does something for me; law means that I do something for God... God has always one sufficient answer, His Son Jesus Christ." — Watchman Nee
Question:
How does knowing that God came to you while you were "foolish" change the way you view the "foolish" people in your life right now?
Action Step:
Write the name of one "difficult" person on a piece of paper. Next to their name, write: "Jesus loved me when I was just like this." Pray for them, asking God to show them the kindness He showed you.
Prayer:
Lord Jesus, thank You for not waiting for me to be good before You were good to me. You washed me when I was filthy. Let Your kindness flow through me to the people who annoy me today. Amen.
DAY 4: NOTHING LEFT TO PROVE
Read: Titus 3:7; Romans 8:16-17
Reflect:
Paul says we have been "justified by his grace" and made "heirs." In a courtroom, justification is the judge banging the gavel and declaring, "Righteous!"
If you are an heir of the King, you possess the Estate. This means you no longer have to fight for pennies. When we realize we are justified, the pressure is off. We don't have to prove our intelligence, our politics, or our worth to anyone. We are safe. And safe people are the only ones who can afford to be truly courteous. You can lower your weapon because your verdict is already in.
Quote:
"To be justified means that God treats you as if you had never sinned and as if you had lived the perfect life of Jesus. You are an heir, not a defendant." — McKay Caston
Question:
If you truly believed you had "nothing left to prove," what conflict in your life would suddenly seem unnecessary?
Action Step:
Memorize the phrase: "I am an heir; I have the Estate." Use this as a "breath prayer" today whenever you feel insecure or criticized.
Prayer:
Abba Father, thank You that the trial is over. The verdict is in. I am Your child. Help me to walk into every room today with the quiet confidence of an heir who has nothing to lose and everything to give. Amen.
DAY 5: ONE MORE
Read: Titus 3:8, 14; Luke 6:27-28
Reflect:
We end our week back on the Ridge. Desmond Doss didn't just survive the battle; he went back into the fire. He prayed, "Lord, help me get one more."
This is the "Get To" of the Christian life. Because we are safe in Christ, we get to go back for the people who hurt us. We get to extend courtesy to the "haters." We get to be the cycle-breakers in our families and workplaces. This isn't a burden; it's our new nature. We are designed to be conduits of the King's kindness in a cruel world.
Quote:
"Forgiveness is not just to be altruistic... If you can find it in yourself to forgive, then you are no longer chained to the perpetrator." — Desmond Tutu
Question:
Who is your "One More"? Who is the person God might be calling you to "carry" with kindness rather than crush with criticism?
Action Step:
Perform a covert act of kindness for someone you disagree with or dislike. Send an encouraging text, buy them a coffee, or simply speak well of them behind their back. Do it not to change them, but because you have been changed.
Prayer:
Lord, help me get one more. Give me the courage to step out of the cycle of hate and into the rhythm of grace. Use me to show the world the shocking courtesy of the Kingdom of God. Amen.
